At school, I essentially have to go through the cisCenter and the cisLeader to deal with anything that I want to change. And there are a few things that I’d like to have fixed. And things that I think would be a good idea even if they aren’t necessary. But none of it is necessary for me, personally. One thing that we’re trying to change is getting the school to use a person’s preferred name on email, ID, etc. Basically- a lot of non-legal things that there’s no reason that you can’t use the preferred name on.
But dealing with the cisCenter is so exhausting and triggering, that I’d really rather pay to get my partner’s name legally changed in the US (which means paying to have it changed on a list of documents and legal things, even though we can’t really afford it) and say “fuck it”. And that’s something that my partner is working on and I don’t have to deal with personally. Things that I work to get changed will be even more draining, especially because I’d have to deal with Keith- who is incredibly triggering for me. It’s getting better, but for awhile I got horribly upset just seeing him around campus, much less being in the same room or having to hear his voice. I can’t imagine speaking with him. This isn’t me just being selfish or lazy, it’s very emotionally damaging for me to handle this- and I can’t always handle it healthwise. I think I completely burnt out trying to deal with what happened last semester, I don’t care to repeat that situation. So things don’t get changed like they should and could if I didn’t have to deal with this to make it happen.